Medical College + GIF Spam

In an earlier post, I talked about my interview at Shifa, a private medical college in my city. I had passed the test and given the interview on the 22nd of October. Through hacks at medstudentz.com, I had gotten my hands on the merit list for the candidates and my name was #30 on the list!! Yesterday, I got a letter in the mail confirming this by inviting me to join the MBBS class of 2019! Isn't this exciting! I'm totally excited! In fact, I'm so happy and excited, I've been a little overwhelmed!

Anyway, I promised to write about my interview properly and so here we go. I'm only writing the gist or whatever I thought was really important.

"You are holding interviews for a job position and one of the applicants says that due to his father's ill health, he was unable to complete the application in time. He is now asking for an interview. What would you do?"

Me: Well, I'd ask him to bring some sort of proof of what he's saying, like a medical certificate of his father and see whether it was really serious or not.
Her: So you think you'd be able to judge whether the condition was serious enough for the candidate to personally attend to?
Me: No, I'd show the certificate to a physician and ask for his advice.
Her: Good, but what if the condition was fifty-fifty?
Me: Then I'd ask at least three physicians and take the majority opinion.
Her: Good, okay. Well, we finished your interview early.
Me: Oh okay. So, uh. What do you think about the Shifa and PMDC issue?
Her: That's not a problem, it'll be resolved in no time.

 "You had an argument with one of your classmates. Your teacher has divided the class into groups and both of you are in the same group. You want the groups to be changed. Request your teacher for this"

Me: Uh. Hello, I'm a student in your class and I have something I wanted to discuss with you.
Her: *nods*
Me: Uh. You recently divided our class into groups for a study project and I want to ask you to change groups.
Her: Why?
Me: Because there's someone in my group who I cannot get along with.
Her: Why?
Me: *flustered* Well, we had an argument and I think our feelings will disturb the rest of the group.
Her: Who started the argument?
Me: *thinking along the lines of 'what the hell'* Uh. Well I'm not sure I could answer that question properly since I'd be biased in my own favor.
Her: Did you think about apologizing?
Me: I think we should give it time to cool off before apologizing.
Her: Okay but why should I change the groups? It's been this way for weeks and it would disturb the class dynamics.
Me: *I think we're roleplaying in two different time sets* I'll find someone willing to change groups.
Her: No one will change groups-
Me: *turns slightly frustrated and mad* No, I will find someone. Let me take care of this and then you can change the groups.
Her: Okay, tell me what the fight was about.
Me: *still mad* I didn't like her so we fought.
Her: Why didn't you like her?
Me: *realizes this was a bad course of action to take* Uh.. she uh... She does her work really late.
Her:...
Me:... *realizes this was a stupid reason to fight imaginary friend with and go complain to teacher for*
Her: ...
Me: *stares at shoes*

"What qualities should a good doctor have? Relate an incident which shows that you possess this quality"

Me: Relate an incident? That's going to be difficult.
Her: No it wont, just tell me something that you did at home or at school that would prove any positive quality needed for being a good doctor.
Me: *clearly confused and has no idea what to say*
Her: Why don't you tell me about an internship you did.
Me: Oh, yeah, I've done a few internships, Most of them were about teaching children in katchi abadis, not like, educating them, but trying to get them interested in reading books and stories and stuff.
Her: So what did you learn about yourself?
Me: I learned that I'm pretty patient. It's really hard to control a group of 8 year olds and keep them entertained *gets an approving nod from interviewer*
Her: And what was the drawback?
Me: Well, the only drawback I felt was the language barrier.
Her: *leans forward* Language barrier?
Me: My Urdu isn't topnotch and for katchi abadi children who are fluent in Punjabi and Urdu, it was a little hard for me to communicate properly with them.
Her: Your Urdu?
Me: Yeah, I came from the States about seven years ago. My Urdu is good for conversation, but it's mostly filled with English words, which I'm sure you know, those children would not have understood so easily.
Her: That's true. So what did you think about Pakistan's education system?
Me: Uh- *bells rungs to end interview*

"You run a tertiary government hospital which is supposed to provide free medication. However, you have a shortage and patients have to end up paying themselves. What would you do?

Me: I'd file a report to the government.
Her: ...
Me: And maybe start a trust or an NGO to get funds for these people.
Her: ...
Me: ...
Her: ...
Me: ....
Her: ...
Me: *sniffs*
Her: You have a cold?
Me: Yeah, it's just mild. It started on the weekend.
Her: Are you taking medicine?
Me: No, just hot milk in the morning.
Her: ...
Me: ....
*bell rings*

"You were exiting a car parking when you hit the car next to you and break something. The security guard sees and informs you that it is Doctor Y's car and he has been told of this incident. Call Doctor Y and tell him what happened"

Me: Hi, my name is Kanra and I accidentally hit your car in the parking lot.
Him: Yeah, the security guard told me, I asked him to get a hold of you. Did you come by yourself or did he send you?
Me: .... I came myself.
Him: Good, so you came by yourself?
Me: Yeah, I felt it would  be better to deal with this problem face to face.
Him: Okay, so do you have a license?
Me: No...
Him: Then why were you driving?
Me: Wait, are we talking about real life or the scenario?
Him: ... the scenario.
Me: Oh! Then I'd have a license!
Him: ... Okay so if you have a license, you must be a careless driver to have hit my car.
Me: It was an accident and besides, my ability to park and unpark a car doesn't really affect how I drive on the streets.
Him: Fair enough. So who's going to pay for the damage?
Me: I'll pay it.
Him: Are you going to pay it or get your parents to pay it?
Me: It was my mistake so I should pay for it.
Him: Okay, that'll be all.

 "You are a drug addict and you really want to get admission into a college. The college is conducting screening tests. What would you do?"

Me: I'd sign up for a rehabilitation program.
Her: But you don't have enough time to get the drug out of your system. What would you do then?
Me: I'd tell the college about my problem and ask them to make concessions for me. I'll tell them I'll join a rehabilitation program and kick off this habit.
Her: Would you think about switching your urine sample with someone else's?
Me: No way! That wouldn't be fair. I would go straight up to the administration.
Her: Okay. Do you think drug addicts should be doctors?
Me: Well, if they kick off the habit, then I think they should definitely become doctors so they can help other people kick it off.
Her: Oh you're taking it in a positive light. Good good.
Me: *psychology classes paid off! whoop whoop!!*
Her: Okay so what do you think about someone taking drugs in your class?
Me: I'd be okay with that person being in my class and I probably wouldn't have anything against them personally, but I'd like to stay away from that person.
Her: Why?
Me: I don't want them turning me into an addict.
Her: How do you think most people turn into addicts?
Me: I imagine someone randomly hands it to them and says "Hey check this!" and they taste it and get addicted.
Her: So is it their fault their addicted?
Me: No, it's not their fault if their addicted but they have the power to kick it off. If they stay addicted, it's definitely their fault.
Her: What would you do if one of your friends starts taking drugs?
Me: I'd talk to her and then call her parents and say "Do you know that your daughter takes drugs?"
Her: What about smokers?
Me: I don't have a problem with smokers as long as they're not smoking in front of me. They can go outside and so it or whatever, but not infront of me. They should respect my feelings about smoking the way I respected theirs.
Her: So why are you lenient towards smoking than towards drugs?
Me: Well, I think drugs are more dangerous, you'd literally watch a human being degrade into an animal. I think that's scary and as a friend, I should stop that from happening.
*bell rings*

 "Here is a table of a survey conducted by an ice cream company who wants to launch a new flavor. Look at the data and explain which flavor they should launch"

This one would be really hard to explain because there was a table of data and I kept referring back to it but the main point I focused on was restricted samples and how you CANNOT survey ice cream flavors from adults when it's actually the children who consume it and to put flavors that people like up front, not random flavors the ice cream company likes.

"Why do you want to be a doctor?"

I can't remember this one really well, but just this snippet.
Him: 70% of females sit at home after getting a degree.
Me: I will be that 30%

And that is how my interview ended xD My percentage was 68%/87.5% and my final percentage is 79%. That means that out of 12.5, I scored an 11 in my interview. Not bad, don't you think? ;)

Oh, and as a sort of celebration for this, I got an iPhone 5 xD pretty random, yeah? I can finally use apps like Whatsapp and Instagram decently (: I still have the Windows with me though.

Now because I have loads of GIFs and this is my blog and I can do whatever I want-

So Kanra, what're you going to do with an iPhone 5?

I haven't really thought about it but-

Don't tell anyone but-

Maybe take a selfie?

And don't tell anyone or..

Cause-

I never realized how much fun it is to talk with GIFs sorry for spamming you guys but that's how happy I am xD

Into My Mind

I thought I'd be a little creative with this post and try to let your guys see what kind of thoughts I have since they seem pretty strange -at times- to myself. I just go rambling on to myself, usually in front of a mirror and in the bathroom where my facial expressions are visible only to myself. Well, here goes xD

I'm standing in front of the mirror.

So my favorite kinds of genres would be fantasy with the hero who over turns society for the better or at least tries to- I find stories like that very interesting and easy to relate to. Better not mention any complex types of novels like 1984. Oh, I also like a Passage to India, I felt that it was a very well written novel, although it was rather long- hold on, I think a Passage of India would also be regarded as a complex novel. I have a feeling that book has too much symbolism, with all those cave echoes and what nots.

I walk out of the bathroom.

My dream was complex too, I mean it was weird. Why would a hospital guard even let me park my dinosaur in the basement parking? Weren't they afraid of it wrecking other people's private properties (cars)? Unimportant characters, seriously, even more idiotic than the dreams themselves.

I open my closet.

Oh there's that pencil with the icky holder. I wonder how it got sticky like that. I didn't even put it anywhere near glue or any other sticky things, better shove it in a corner where it can't spread it's disease. I should really try using those paints sometimes- such a waste. It would be nice to sit down and doodle around a bit now that I have so much time.

I leave the room.

So if I need to explain why I'm a doctor, I have exactly three reasons to state and out of the three, two are selfish reasons. But I'll start with the selfless reason first and that would be that I love helping people and I feel that being a doctor would be better for me because it gives an almost immediate effect on people and they are actually grateful to you. On the other hand, teachers are super helpful too and they have a much longer role in changing lives- but let's be honest, you're going to have to face the same kids for a whole year.

I go to the kitchen for a drink.

Okay and the selfish reason is that I'm rather afraid of dying so I'd like to know when I have a disease or complication before anyone else and be able to take first steps to counter it. And yes, that is super selfish if you ask me because it wouldn't benefit anyone and probably give me more stress. Wow, I'd be a wreck then, wouldn't I? Better not say that in the interview.

I take out my laptop.

What was the third reason? Hmm. Gah, I forgot the third reason. Mental facepalm. I should post on my blog more often. Wouldn't it be funny if I had a machine that could type down all the words I'm thinking? That would make things easier for me but, now that I think about it, it would be an awful lot of junk that the poor machine would be typing away at. I mean, who the heck cares about the blabbering my brain is doing. Well, it would be rather interesting, I suppose. Maybe I should make a blog post about this. I'll start with "I thought I'd be a little creative with this post and try to let you guys see what kind of thoughts I have..."

INQILAAB! REVOLUTION!

I don't know if this shows up on your news feed or news channel or whatevers but Pakistan is currently having a revolution which is... not exactly a revolution. Basically, there's this guy called Imran Khan who won us the Cricket world cup some decades ago and now he's here to try winning us a Democracy cup (cause yknow, Pakistan looks like it's either run by families who take turns on the seat of power, or the military). Now, let's get this clear, I don't have much to say against Imran Khan because honestly, he seems pretty cool most of them time, but that was until he decided to bring this "inqilaab".

[Inqilaab means revolution]

This was brought about by the Azadi (Freedom) March which was around the 14th of August which is also Pakistan's Independence Day. Of course, at first we thought it would fun and games, a march on Independence Day and more festivity and nationalism and patriotism and all the other isms that suddenly makes us emotional slaves of our country for those precious 24 hours of the year where EVERYONE decides to take a selfie in green and tag it as #OMGIHEARTPAKISTAN and #ILOVEMYCOUNTRY while the rest of the year its something like #IwishIlivedinUSA or #PakistanIsSoLame or whatever. I'm not judging this bit, but what I AM judging is how this day got mixed up with Imran Khan's march and suddenly, it wasn't "Happy Independence Day"- it was "Azadi! GO PTI!!"

[PTI is Imran Khan's political party, it stands for Pakistan Tehreek e Insaaf, or Pakistan Movement for Justice]

Like, excuse me. What? WHAT?!

And you know what was even more unforgivable? It was how Imran Khan was suddenly equated with Muhammad Ali Jinnah, the founder of Pakistan. If you ask my opinion, I haven't seen Imran Khan do anything as good on such a large scale as what Jinnah did- he cannot be even placed parallel to Jinnah.

I think I'll say this again, I don't have a problem with Imran Khan. But I don't have a problem with John Green and TFIOS either- but I just didn't get the hype about them. Same with Imran Khan. My newsfeed is FLOODED with #ILoveImranKhan and #ImranKhanIsMyLeader but honestly, he has been sitting in the capital of this country for almost a week now (maybe less, but the city HAS been semi-locked down for a week) and he hasn't got anything to show for it except for tons of biased updates where people are like

OMG I HAVE NEVER SEEN SUCH SOLIDARITY IN PAKISTAN

IMRAN KHAN WILL DEFINITELY BRING INQILAAB

THE MARCH IS GOING GREAT

(GOODNESS GRACIOUS PEOPLE, GET A GRIP. THIS CROWD HAS BEEN SITTING HERE FOR DAYS AND NOTHING HAS HAPPENED YET. OBVIOUSLY SOMETHING IS NOT GOING VERY GOOD)

The thing is, Imran Khan has the support of all the wrong people. He has the undying support of the youth- more than half of which can't even legally vote yet. They'll all come out in the streets and party and go wild and have fun, but they can't give him their votes because they DONT HAVE IT TO BEGIN WITH.

Oh, while we talk about Imran Khan's youth support, I want to bring up the immaturity of his fans. The things I see, posted proudly by underage Imran Khan fangirls and fanboys mind boggles me. I cannot fathom how such young minds can jump from supporting Imran Khan to deciding to take matters into their own hands and insulting people of the opposite party.

Translations:-

"Hopefully I am not disturbing you, lady with the make up"

"We don't like you AT ALL"

"When you ran away to get married, didn't baldy say anything?" 

"Why don't you run away with someone again, and take baldy with you?"

"You are so lame"

"BTW. You ran away and got married, right? Awww :p If the Prime Minister can't get his daughter to listen to him, how can he expect the same of his nation?"

[Ganjay, or baldy refers to the current Prime Minister, Nawaz Sharif]

I think it's fine if you tweet to the person things like "I don't think you should comment on this" or "I don't support you" or "I don't agree with your stances" but it's a completely different story if you decide to drag in that person's personal life and mix it up with their politics and then spew it out venomously- especially if you're underage and don't even have a vote.

Let's take away the political affiliations from the example I quoted above. Instead of a bunch of PTI supporters insulting the married daughter of the Prime Minister, it can also be seen as harassment a woman has to face from children a decade- if not more- junior to her. Blatant display of discourtesy to elders- something that is not respected in Islam.

On top of that, it's also against Islam to speak so foully against another person. And since Imran Khan is also marching around Islamabad saying things about Iman (faith) and being Muslims and stuff, I seriously expected better behavior from both, his online fan club and the fan club present at the march (the latter fan club has been seen to be enjoying the concerts set up to entertain them as well as dancing along in shameless ways).

I tried explaining this to the person who was so proudly displaying this on their timeline by commenting about it. I immediately got a private messaging saying "You didn't need to comment that" and instant removal of it (my comment, not the post in question).

This new generation, I swear, is the most jaahil generation I have ever had the fortune to meet. 

Let's talk about the March. It has been almost a week and Imran Khan's demands seem to be getting crazier and crazier. He wants the current PM to step down and he has already declared himself as the Prime Minister of Pakistan ("Prime Minister Imran Khan will never lie to you!"). Can we talk about how wrong this is on so many levels?

First of all, Nawaz Sharif has only done one year of his term. If he does step down, doesn't Imran Khan realize that this would boost Nawaz Sharif's chance at getting hold of the PM seat again? Why? Well, firstly because 1. Nawaz Sharif has NEVER completed a term 2. He can always blame Imran Khan and say "The nation owes me another chance at fixing this country" 3. When Imran Khan messes up, Nawaz Sharif would be like "HAHA LOL I TOLD YOU IMRAN KHAN WAS NOTHING- MAKE ME PM AGAIN GUYS!"

Imran Khan should have waited till the next election before trying to display his strength as a political leader- he should have tried to become the Prime Minister in the "democratic" way- the same way he is fighting for right now. Not only would the remaining four year increase his vote bank as more fanboys and fangirls become legal, but he could also try harder to win the votes of the older population by actually doing something with the province he has won through the last election. I personally think it is hypocrisy- him demanding Nawaz Sharif to step down early and at the same time, demand democracy. It seems everyone loves using the word democracy when it means YOU get the chance to sit on the seat.

Last but not least, Pakistan has much more important problems to deal with right now, much more important than an accused feudal Prime Minister who has only done one year of his term. Pakistan has national debts, a failing economy, terrorism, health issues, power issues, security issues and growing intolerance among its people for minorities. It seems to me that Imran Khan is being used as a decoy to ensnare the attention of the masses and to keep the media busy from reporting the actual dangers Pakistan is currently facing. (Quite possibly a cover to get General Musharaf out of the country and safe from the punishment his nation wants to see inflicted on him).

May Allah protect this country from those who seek to destroy it from within.

Good news and Bad news and Worse News

RUN!!!!

I like how Maine divides her posts into days and I'm afraid that with all the days that have passed by, I'll have to do the same to update it all. I know I left saying that I was going to Chitral and I guess you guys are waiting for a super amazing travel post but unfortunately, that's not going to happen for reasons I will start giving below as I tell you what I've been up to >.>

9th August 2014: SATURDAY

[Excerpt from journal]

I passed the AKU exam! So now I have this permanent grin plastered on my face since yesterday. But that's not important.

The important thing is that today we set out for Chitral. We were supposed to leave at 5 pm but we got a little late. Anyway the drive itself was rather pleasant except for the fact that Islamabad's to-be-condition was making a negative impact on the trip.

There's supposed to be a long march and some other random stuff going on that would cause possible damage to the capital so that's why the city has apparently been scheduled to shut down. Possible bad-case scenarios also put the ER Department on high alert (presumably) so with my dad on a road trip, people were calling and going like "What're we going to do?!"

Well that issue got resolved after a few hours.

We stopped at an army mess in Nowshera after passing signboards saying stuff like Kamra, Mulan Mansoor and Hassan Abdal. The army mess was really well-kept and beautiful place- too bad it was already dark. There was a large lawn which was really well cared for bound by a small fence. On approaching th fence, I realized that there was a vast river-which- in the dark and the distance- appeared like a large, vast plain. The River Kabul.

We had dinner and walked around. There were jasmine bushes with some (few) blooming flowers- it looked like someone had already picked them off. There was s sort of open air cafe (which looked really stylish) and a wall with embedded squares and a light in their center so from far away they looked like lanterns.

^the lantern-wall^

Hania started complaining that her headache was getting worse and worse and that started creating more complications because the next stage of the trip involved driving to Chitral throughout the night- and my father didn't want to have Hania spend solid hours in the car with her headache.

^Outdoor cafe thing^

For a long moment it seemed as though the trip was over and we'd be back in Islamabad just in time for bed-but then we realized that my taya (uncle) lives about fifteen minutes from where we were right then- so that was part of the new plan; split off from the main Chitral caravan and spend the night at Risalpur and see how it fares in the morning.

10th August 2014: SUNDAY

Stayed in Risalpur till almost 1pm and that's when we head out back for Islamabad. The drive itself was- once again- rather pleasant although uneventful but when we entered the city we saw that a lot of the roads had containers set beside them- ready to have the roads closed and the city blockaded.

^container outside the city's toll entrance, ready to block the road^

^containers blocking half of the road already^

We spent most of the day at home, planning on what to do next. My brother wanted to watch Dawn of the Planet of the Apes but the seats were booked for today so we reserved some for Monday. In the evening, there was supposed to be a Palestine Rally at Khyber Chawk and we decided to go attend it.

First of all, no one knew what Khyber Chawk was exactly and this event wasn't publicized on Facebook (the positive bit about doing so is that Facebook provides you a map, making it easier to attend) and we spent a good half hour looking for the rally in places it wasn't going to be. However, we finally got there after finding out that Khyber Chawk was near the Zero Point Exchange.

^car found at rally^

^rally from the bystander's view^

11th August 2014: MONDAY

Today wasn't such a good day because I really didn't want to go to academy and give the mock exams (I thought we'd be in Chitral and that I was free of these tests D:) but my mother was like "Go .__." and so I had to go. I'd only planned to go for the exam and come home right afterwards but that plan backfired sort of.

I was trying to leave the campus when the guard was saying something to me which I couldn't understand (I think he was mixing up pashto in it so I really didn't understand) and kept trying to leave but he wouldn't let me leave so I was like what the heck and he kept motioning to the office. So I was forced to stand in the office listen to some other girl say to all the office managers (who were all male) that she wanted to go home and could they let her leave already? But obviously they said no >__> I hate those people, honestly.

Anyway so they were like "Why do you want to go home?"

Me: *totally clammed up and already freaked out with too much adrenaline on being cornered in an office, having my right to leave the campus denied and all of these by men who in that moment looked extremely heartless, barbaric and cruel* I just wanna go home.

Them: Don't you have a reason?

Me: I wanna go home.

Them: Okay, we're gonna call your parents then. Here, call your mom.

Me: *calls mom, find sister, gets told mom is busy*

Them: Okay, we're gonna call your dad then.

Me: *silently swears at them to hurry the heck up cause I wanna go home*

Them: Hello, we're the academy dudes who are totally evil and trying to stop your daughter from leaving the campus two hours early.... Uhuh.... Okay *hands phone to me*

Me: *self-consciously takes phone* *whispers* Hullo?

Baba: What's wrong, you want to go home early?

Me: I wanna go home. *whispers*

Baba: Why, what's wrong?

Me: I just wanna go home.

Baba: ....

Me: ....

Baba: Okay, give the phone back.

Them: *takes phone* Okay, sure, thanks. *hangs up* You can leave, just enter your details in this form.

Me: *writes down name, class date etc and gives reason for leaving early as "none"

And then I left and I was still feeling really shaken because I don't like being interrogated or forced to explain myself to an audience that is 100% male. I hate it. I freaking hate that office now >:| 

Anyway, when my dad came home he's like "Are you okay" and I'm like "Yeah" and he said "You sounded like something was really wrong on the phone" and I said "No I was just stressed out" while I'm silently thinking *no girl should have to go what I went through*.

After that, we went to Centaurus Cineplex to watch the Dawn of the Planet of the Apes which was surprisingly a pretty good movie. I liked it- cliches and all.

^Centaurus decked for 14th August^

12th August 2014: TUESDAY

I got my CIE result today- AAABC which isn't so bad considering the C is in Psychology which was an extra subject I took and shouldn't really affect my grade because the pre-med subjects should be what actually count and that's where I got the As in (Biology, Chemistry and Physics).

Bought mithai and went to grandmother's + aunt's place.

13th August 2014: WEDNESDAY

I went to my old school and got a reference letter from the Principal for the AKU Part 2 admission procedure. Oh- and guess what, while I was in the academy I accidentally dropped my phone and wrecked the screen.

I'm sorry, I'm just being really emotional about my phone right now so I'm just gonna spam pictures of it.

And in case you were wondering how it looked before crashing.

I know I wanted an android, but I don't want to let go of my phone just yet :( I know its an outdated Windows 7.5 (heck, it doesn't update to the latest Windows 7.8 no matter how many times you try) and it has a lame battery (barely lasts five hours if you're texting/using continuously) and most of the apps are faulty, but it's still an amazing phone because

1. Less battery means more charging and less using and less playing and more studying.

2. It has FOURTEEN GB inside it, man! How much more could you ask for? I don't have to face problems about storing in phone or on SD card because there is no SD card slot AND the phone itself has LOTS of memory to spare.

3. It's got pretty neat in-built stuff, like the texting system can be directly connected to facebook- so if I want to message someone from my phone, I get to pick if I want to message via text, Facebook or Windows Live which is super cool and wowed me when I found out about it.

4. It has NEVER hanged on me. Ever. The system is fluid and doesn't lag at all despite having an update available.

I hope I can get the screen fixed. The phone is fully functional, everything is in great working order- it's just the cracks on the screen. I can feel the cracks when I touch or swipe and the lines are too close together so it does obscure a lot of things that I have to tilt the phone around to see.

This phone has been with me for a little more than two years and I don't wanna let it go just yet ;n; quick- say a prayer for the Catalina- that she may be restored to her former glory and continue serving Kanra ;n;

Letters With Sparkly Surprises

OMGHIJKLMNOPQRS- Okay. I'm totally calm. This post will be a total jumble for many reasons so I'll just write the important things first and then elaborate (it won't look that way to you though >.>)

AKU MBBS ENTRY TEST RESULT

HEYYYY!! I GOT IT!!! JUST TODAY!!!

So I was typing a blogpost for a reason I will expand on in the next point. The bell rang and my brother went to check it and he's like "There's a package for you" and I was like "Okay bro" and internally I was like "ASDFHWWOAURVN" and then I went outside and the guy is like "Are you Kanra" and I'm like "Yeah" and he's like "Okay sign here" and I'm like *signs* and then he gives me the envelope and then I go inside and I close the door and I just stand there for a few seconds and I'm like.

Dude. What if I've failed?

NAH LOL LETS OPEN IT RIGHT NOW.

And then I opened it and at first I got a little confused cause it was a letter and I thought I'd just get maybe a card that has gigantic text saying "CONGRATS YOU PASSED" or "CONGRATS YOU FAILED" but now I've realized that universities don't work that way.

^The Letter With The Sparkly Surprise

ROAD TRIP TO CHITRAL

I don't think I've updated this bit, but we're going to Chitral tomorrow (Saturday) so that's why I'm busy typing up my book review posts to queue over the week.

I haven't packed anything yet. My mother says that three changes of clothes are enough and that I have to iron all three and fold it carefully and all the other travel stuff. I won't be taking my laptop along (there won't be any wifi) but I would be carrying my camera (which sadly, has a battery charger running on 120V whereas the mainsupply is 240V so I think the camera will be out of action before even half the journey/trip is done). I'll be taking my journal to record everything as well as a couple of books to study/read. Oh, that reminds me, I went to a book shop earlier this week and bought two books.

I've already finished reading Paper Towns and I'll probably taking A Passage to India with me.

REGISTRATION FOR UHS MCAT

This morning I went to RMC (Rawalpindi Medical College) with my dad with all my documents attested and all my photographs and everything ready and we got the form and sat in the auditorium until our number got called and then we got me registered. After that we went to Shifa and I waited until the driver came to pick me up. Meanwhile, some of the doctors there asked me about how my studying was going and if I was nervous about my upcoming result.

RIGHT! So I think that'll be all. I will most probably be without WiFi for about a week but I'll use my cellular data to update Twitter >.> So if you're interested in my road trip updates my username is @KanraTSK (It changes a lot >.> I think this is the third or fourth time I've changed it) and it goes by Catalina Blue. (Sorry if I'm confusing you. Kanra/Catalina will both suffice although I prefer Kanra)

Update + Post + Sunshine Award

I do this tooo much

Alot of things have been on my mind at the moment so here I am, trying to make some sense of it.

I think I know why I study so hard. It's because I'm not good at anything else and I really want to prove myself useful in some sort of way. I've always been placed in the background and never really complimented and the only time people notice me is when they find out about my grades.

I'm not good at anything except studying. I am a disaster in the kitchen and I can't clean properly. I think I have some sort of problem with following verbal directions. I'm not pretty or sociable and I think I just come across as a sullen girl when I really want to be special in some sort of way and I think it's getting grades that has become my answer to this.

I need to pass this MCAT test. I mean, what use am I if I can't pass it? I'm terrible at everything and useful for nothing. The least I could do is ace it and get a good grade. And if I do fail, what do I do then? Sit at home and start messing things up until I get them right? I can't stand constant failure.

Yes TT__TT

Well, those are three random statements that I have formed this weekend. Now on to the good stuff >.>

Saturday, 2nd August 2014 - went to a friend-of-my-dad's place. They had come to visit us and stay at our house in Florida and they moved back to Pakistan shortly after we did but they were in Karachi and we were in Islamabad. Now they've shifted to Islamabad and we met for the second time six years after the first (2008). It was pretty cool xD All I remember are small fragments of memories but my mother remembers a lot more and she's like "Do you remember how mischievous those kids were- they used to do crazy tricks in our swimming pool and remember that incident at the Arab restaurant-" and I'm like "Uhh. I don't remember it all that well, just sketchy stuff". I'm going to dig out my diary from that summer and see what I can find.
After that, we went to my grandmother's place where they were planning to leave for a barbeque picnic the next day.

Sunday, 3rd August 2014 - Sooo- the barbecue picnic! WE set out around 8:00 am ish and went to my grandmother's place to wait for everyone to gather so we could leave at the same time. My aunt had already left early in the morning to set the grill and stuff. We shuffled passengers around in the two cars we had and I had to sit with my aunt's daughter who got left behind because she was asleep and her mother didn't want to wake her (she's barely two years old). Aasia wasn't a problem at all, until we almost reached our destination and that's when she started squirming and crying and I was at a loss on how to keep her quiet. She didn't quiet down and kept wailing until she got back to her parents.
The spot we picked was awesome. The view was great and despite weather reports, it was surprisingly cool with an occasional breeze.

Two of the cars. The one on the left is ours.

Here's part of the view and the third car.

Found some mushrooms >.> or toadstools. Whatever.

Food >.>

It was lots of fun and a well spent Sunday morning :D Now on to the Sunshine Award.

The Sunshine Award is pretty common and it involves eleven answers, eleven question and then some nominations etc. So here are the questions I got.

Q) Happiest experience you've had so far?
A) Well, I can't really recall anything specific. You know how people in books haave this good stuff happening and then the narration adds something cheesy like "And that was the happiest moment that XXXX was ever going to have for a long time" before something tragic happens? Well, apparently my life's narration is yet to say anything like that- tragic turn happening or not.

Q) What are your interests?
A) I'm interested in reading, writing and making things! But when I mean making things, I am usually talking about art and craft sort of things. Kitchen creations aren't exactly my specialty... *quickly shoves all kitchen mishaps into cabinet under sink*

Q) Favorite artist and why?
A) Are we talking about painting artists or music artists or some other kind of artists?

Q)You can control one of the four elements. What would it be, earth, water, air or fire?

A) DEFINITELY

WATERBENDING

BECAUSE

ITS

AWESOME

A shame I couldn't find any Korra gifs, tumblr is being super slow.

Q) Favorite book of all time?
A) Well that's a super hard question, but whatever I recommend on my blog can be said to be on my favorites list xD

Q) Would you rather have a beautiful voice or be an amazing virtuoso of an instrument of your choice?
A) The voice- definitely the voice.

Q) Favorite color?
A) Red, then purple and then black!

Q) Name one ambition of yours
A) Probably reading, writing and stuff. Idk >__>

Q) Any secret talents?
A) 

Q) How do you want other people to see you?

A) Cute but ferocious... OMG SORRY I HAD TO USE THIS OMG HE'S SO FUNNY xD being ferocious and all xDDD

Q) Name one characteristic you want in a boyfriend.
A) Loyal and all the other random fluffy friendship stuff.

I think watching Sherlock and Supernatural and Korra and Tumblr is getting way too  much into my head.
Oh, on the bright side, I forgot to tell you guys that I started playing DOTA 2 >.> and I keep dying and sometimes its fun. I've settled on three characters that I find dependable so far- the Tidehunter, the Legion Commander and Lina. I've played multiplayer a few times but everyone's always like "Noob >.>" and I'm like "Yes, Noob >.>"

Anyway, my questions for the Sunshine Award.

1) The first book series you've ever read.
2) Do you have conversation with yourself? What is it usually about?
3) Favorite childhood memory?
4) That one arch nemesis you have/had- could you describe them?
5) How did you and your best friend meet?
6) Every had an instant dislike of a teacher? (Like Harry and Snape?) How did you realize you didn't like them?
7) Recently joined fandom?
8) The last book you read?
9) The most exciting thing that happened to you this summer is?
10) Blog vs Journal- pick one!
11) Why do you blog?

My nominees
MJ
Kashaf A
Maine Lyn
Syed Arsalan Aijaz

The Ramadan Diaries: Eid!

I think I should start this post by saying EID MUBARAK (belatedly).

Eid is the religious holiday which Muslims celebrate after Ramadan, the month of fasting. As a result, it is celebrated in a unique spirit among all Muslim households. Eid starts off with the Eid Prayer which is in the morning, around 7 to 8 am.

This year's Eid was a little toned down in my family due to a very recent death, the death of my father's uncle who was a main elder in our family. He had been diagnosed with cancer at it's last stages and despite all efforts to combat it, he succumbed two days before Ramadan started. The entire illness lasted maximum four or so months. (Innalillahiwainnillaihirajiun)

Another reason for the somewhat lack of festivity was the fact that a good 1/3rd of our relatives had decided to celebrate their Eid in Karachi instead of Islamabad.

After the Eid prayer, we usually have lots of people coming and going but that wasn't the case this time. Around 12pm we went out to meet some relatives. During Eid, such meetings usually involve eating all the yummy stuff made and collecting Eidi. Eidi is money that adults give to children to celebrate.

On the second day of Eid, we were mostly at home until 6pm because that's when the Family Variety show started. The FVS (I shortened it :D) is a sort of program conducted by my uncle with help from some of my cousins and it involves lots of competitions and games. I didn't really participate in anything except the 3D art category because I'd REALLY wanted to make a pinata D: also, I felt kind of embarrassed to go and do anything else- not with tons of younger kids to 'compete' with. So I've decided that next time, I'll get my younger siblings totally prepared so they could do something worthwhile.

The pinata I made was somewhat a success. Nobody hit it with a stick though- children were given one chance to punch it and it kind of broke (I'd attached a string to hold it up with but it collapsed within the first five punches) and then it was broken by the time the kids' turns were done. It started spilling out candy and all the kids were like "Wooooww" and they collected whatever they could find and I felt rather pleased with myself. (The pinata got me first place, no surprise there)

Overall the event was great, it was lots of fun and really entertaining. I think my family has the greatest Eids ever and I'm extremely grateful for that. Not many families have such creativity displayed on their festive holidays.

Eid Mubarak :D

#RantTime

I think every one has had those times where they used to have a pretty good friend who has just either drifted away or vanished completely. Don't you hate it when that happens?

Well, it's most certainly not your fault, I'd say. I think I've written this somewhere before, but I'll write it again. Personality is a dynamic aspect of a person and it is constantly under evolution. Your personality will never be static because it's going to be affected and continuously modified with every new bit and byte of information that enters your system.

Having said that, with so many different people constantly evolving in so many ways, its almost reasonable to realize that of course, some cogs will not turn together in the same direction. There will always be people who would have evolved -although they may appear to be static- but the result of some may not be pretty for all.

It's okay if someone leaves for you that. I think I understand things like this completely. People are not dolls, they think and feel for themselves and everyone has a right to go where they think they fit in better or where they are given the attention they think is deserved.

You might think that means you're left behind, but that's not exactly correct. You see, it takes two people to tango, or in urdu, taali do haath se bajti hai (you can only clap with two hands). And from Newton's point of view, every action has an equal and opposite reaction. You might think you're stationary, but that is not true at all. You change just as much as the other people around you. You just have to sit down and see yourself through the days and weeks and months and years.

But the thing is, there are times when you have to rethink about those old days and you wonder if you could set things right, perhaps. Let me tell you right now.

#NotPossible #Nope #Don'tEvenTry

I've tried patching things up TWICE and both failed, epicly. The first attempt was when I just randomly texted for absolutely no reason other than to strike up a conversation. Of course, the conversation happened but it kept losing its "We're talking!" spark so fast, I was like "Naw, okay let's give up" and didn't bother replying when it was my turn to reply to a ".__." text.

Next, there was a third party who told me that the other person was like "Omg Catalina doesn't talk with us". Wait, let me explain this one properly. What happened was a sort of a fight where I was neutral-ish and then things got bad and people split up. So the split group was on their own and pretty happy about it too, so I couldn't really bring myself to say "Yo wassup" or anything cause that would be kind of awkward. I mean, I didn't wanna seem too clingy or end up trying to pile up guilt on their side.

Anyway, so on the request of this third person, I texted the person a neutral "Hello" and I get messages that come back like, twenty minutes later every time. But it wasn't even a proper conversation, it just went like "Hello" "?" "I said hello" "Hmm?" "I just wanted to say hello" (this was the conversation that lasted about an hour) and then "What do you want" "I was just checking up on you, like whats up and stuff" "Are you kidding me?" "Ah.. which answer would be be best?" and then there was a long pause and then "I'm sorry but I'm a polite person, go talk with someone else"

LIKE EXCUSE ME ARE YOU IMPLYING THAT I AM NOT POLITE DID YOU JUST NOTICE HOW LONG IT TOOK YOU TO REPLY ARE YOU SAYING THAT I AM RUDE DID YOU JUST CALL ME RUDE HOW DARE YOU- GO DROWN IN SEAWEED EXCUSE ME.

So, lesson learned is DON'T EVEN BOTHER TRYING TO WIN BACK FRIENDS WHO DON'T EVEN CARE because no one is going to notice the effort you put in, no one is going to notice how you gathered up the courage, no one is going acknowledge that you tried. And you know the worst part? The person you're trying to make it up to will most definitely make themselves feel victimized and tell themselves "I don't deserve to have this person come talk to me" and that would just make the overall balance even worse. So don't do it. Don't try gluing things back. It'll just get even more ugly. Leave it where it is. No one will think twice when they walk by the shattered remains. No one... except you.

The Compounded Liebster Award

I love being awarded. It gives me an excuse to click on the "New Post" button with something substantial in my mind. Also, I love answering questions. There's something vaguely satisfying about trying to answer truthfully. Anyway, without further ado, I will start typing my fingers off for this post!

My nomination came from Girl in Ebony (click right there for her Liebster Award post) and then Maine Lyn nominated "whoever is reading (my post)" and because I liked her questions so much, I jumped at the second chance xD

Well, first of all, let's go over the conditions. The Liebster Award requires you to share eleven facts about yourself, answer eleven question put forward by your nominator and then nominate other bloggers. (There are some other specific conditions as well, but let's just quickly shove it into the Recycle Bin >.>)

ELEVEN FACTS

1. I like downloading lots of photo apps and using the same photo in all of them to see which one I like better 
2. I prefer written conversations rather than spoken ones.
3. I don't like being unnecessarily touched because I have a feeling that the whole world has an agenda that involves tickling o.o
4. I don't mind hugging :D
5. I like watermelon flavored candy and stuff, but not the actual fruit, which tastes rather bland to me.
6. I love watching anime and shows like Doctor Who o.o
7. I enjoy reblogging and trying to set a queue up to 200 posts on tumblr :3 (its all anime though)
8. I'll go through tons of DIYs and never do a single one .__. sad, I know.
9. I've been planning to splurge on art supplies but I haven't got the chance yet ;n; my MCAT classes seem to be draining all of my everything!
10. Did I tell you guys about my new laptop :3 Oh, I think I did 
11. I think Naruto is turning out to be an extremely stretched out story >.> I must make a post on why it is so annoying...

Okay, now for the eleven questions. First of all, from Girl in Ebony :D

Q: What question do you hate to be asked?

A: *concerned auntie voice* "Beta (dear), do you eat properly?" like heck yes auntie I stuff my face like a barbarian, it just doesn't show on me >:| (no, I don't stuff my face like a barbarian, but I don't diet at all. I eat whatever I want, whenever I want, but it just DOESNT SHOW ON ME)

Q: What was your favorite conversation (with your crush) about?

A: If we are talking about crushes, they're mostly fictional and involve things like "EXCUSE ME COULD'NT YOU EVEN TRY LIVING I MEAN WHY DO YOU HAVE TO DIE ITS NOT FAIR" and then I make a new scenario where the character doesn't die. I think that could be, psychologically, called denial...

Q: What have you wanted to do for ages but never done? When do you think you'll be able to do it?

A: I've been wanting to make a decent, lovely scrapbook ;n; I've been wanting for ages, and I was like "I will do it this year. Iwilliwilliwill!" aaand... I'm still I-will-ing...

Q: Who do you miss most at the moment?

A: Well, I miss all of my friends xD It's summer vacation, so no school, so no seeing them every day! Plus, Lilly's gone to another city :( But I skypes with Birdie yesterday- it was fun and I was like, let's do it every week. Unfortunately, I can't do that with Lilly (probably) because she's in a hostel at the moment. Apart from that, I just have this exam tomorrow, then I'm planning on asking my friends to go out and watch a movie with me or something (maybe Maleficent?) 

Q: Do you believe in horoscopes? Why/Why not? Do you read it?

A: No, I don't believe in horoscopes because my religion says it is not permissible. For clarity, let me quote.

Not only is the practice of astrology is haram, but also visiting an astrologer and listening to his predictions, buying books on astrology or reading one's horoscope are also forbidden. Since astrology is mainly used to predicting the future, those who practice it are considered fortunetellers. Consequently, one who seeks his horoscope comes under the ruling contained in the Prophet's statement,"The salah (daily prayer) of whoever approaches a fortune teller and asks him about anything will not be accepted for forty days and nights."[Sahih Muslim, vol. 4, p. 1211, no. 5440]

The punishment in this hadith is simply for approaching the asking the astrologer, even if one is in doubt about the truth of his statements. If one is in doubt about the truth or falsehood of astrological information, he is in doubt about whether or not others know the unseen and the future besides Allah.

Haram means "forbidden" btw. I hope this answers the question and also gives the readers a little extra info :D

Q: Favorite quote? Is there any meaning behind it?
A:

Q: Favorite Song?
A: Let me link it for you :3

Q: Which superpower do you want the most?
A:

#UchihaPowers

Q: What is your favorite hairstyle that you've ever had?
A: ......... can we talk about hijab styles..?

Q: Favorite computer game? Why?
A: OMG LET ME TELL YOU ABOUT THIS ATTACK ON TITAN GAME I PLAYED. (this won't answer your question by the way, but I just had to tell you guys this). It's basically a game where you are a SnK character and you have to kill titans. It's a very complex game with alot of controls (okay, maybe not that much, but it IS more than the average game) and let me tell you, that game is as scary as... Gengar. Even worse! You could be sailing around in your 3DMG and trying to kill the titan but the freaking titan is so fast and you just have to get caught and it eats you in the most gruesome way. (I had Mikasa's head torn off once) and its just SCARY. (I screamed when I died the first time because it was so sudden). Anyway, after that I had a nightmare where my city had titans and I was the best 3DMG user, but all I had were cans of airfreshener. So I was just zipping around trying not to get eaten and spraying titans with lilac scented freshener. I cannot tell you how terrifying that was. (just google Attack on Titan game if you're interested in trying it out)

Q: Do you think you'll be very different when you're older? What will have changed by then?
A: Well I can't really say haha. Basically, personality is a dynamic part of you. It will always change, whether you're in university, or if you're working or if you're retired. It is impossible for a person to remain stationary in character (WHY DO BOOK AUTHORS AND MANGAKA NOT UNDERSTAND THAT) so for all I know, I may predict some change and actually show the complete opposite xD

Okay, now for Maine's questions!

Q: What are you most interested in?
A: I like reading, writing, trying out new things, looking at DIYs and going like "Mmhm, I can do that" and then shutting it down and not bothering to do it even if I really want to. (the satisfaction of being able to do it seems to be enough for me o.o)

Q: When you find yourself in an embarrassing situation, do you laugh it off or get upset about it?
A: I pretend to laugh it off while I secretly nurse my injured pride and plot to assassinate you in various ways.

Q: Are you an introvert, extro-
A: *cuts off question* INTROVERT ALL THE WAY!

Q: Type of person you're attracted to
A: Well, if we're talking girls, I like people who respect silence (as in, they don't feel the need to fill every pause up with talking) and its a plus point if we have common interests. If we're talking about guys, I'll like them as long as they stay far away enough for my TOXICALERT not to go off.

Q: What do you believe in?
A: I believe in Allah, His messengers, His books, His Angels, the Day of Judgement and the fact that every man will be brought to account to every single one of his deeds, whether good or bad and that Divine Justice will be meted out on the Day.

Q: What videos do you usually watch on Youtube? Or favorite tv shows?
A: Did I tell you that Youtube is banned in my country? I don't think I did. Well, I don't miss Youtube that much anymore. But when I did use it, I used to watch Ryan Higa (yus Maine xD) and random anime stuff where people dub them and make funny episodes (omg, search "Akatsuki Unlimited" on youtube, the first episode is HILARIOUS you will die laughing! the jokes are all words though, so you'll have to listen attentively). As for favorite tv shows, it'll be Doctor Who currently.

Q: Funniest conversation (IRL or text messaging) you've ever had?
A: I've had my fair share of funny conversations but I can't seem to recall any right now...

Q: What do you do when you feel alone?
A: TUMBLAR. Oh, and I come on and read all the lovely blogs I've got followed. Pinterest is next if I'm really desperate >.>

Q: Can you go at least an entire day without social interaction?
A: Easy. I am quite happy to keep my thoughts to myself.

Q: Ebooks or books or you don't read at all?
A: Ebooks first >.> (I don't like wasting my money on a book I might not like). If I like it, I'll buy it. (I bought the Hunger Games series after reading the ebooks. The thing about good books is that you can read them over and over again, so it's not a problem buying the hard copy when you know it'll be worth it).

Q: What do you think of school/work?
A: School is a challenge. Work is when you get paid >.> end of thinking capacity.

Okay, now my eleven questions.

1. The scariest nightmare you've ever had?
2. The childhood fear that seems silly, but still frightens you to some extent?
3. These kind of people are the worst! What characteristic do these people have?
4. The kind of book you would LOVE to read would have...
5. If you had one single wish (because three is just unfair) what would you wish for? 
6. The perfect sort of holiday would be...
7. Would you rather stay in your own country or go abroad for studies etc? Which countries, if so?
8. You favorite pastimes involve...
9. If you had a chance to help humanity, how would you do it?
10. The biggest problem in the world must be this. What is it, in your point of view?
11. Have you ever been bullied? o.o

Now for my nominees!
Envy @ Picking up the pieces
Anna McAuley @ Banana and Bear
F @ The Fence Of Stars

Have a nice day <3

Butchering the English Language

I can't seem to study properly. I've been flipping through my notebooks, ticking things off in my head, referring back to the syllabus to find several portions I've never even heard of. I flip back to my latop and attempt to decipher these topics from the MCAT book I've got downloaded, but then I get tired of reading and I can't make up my mind on what exactly to study. Turn your head to the image at the right to get a clear idea of the situation I am trying to portray *failed Snape voice*.

I've tried alot of things. I tried playing Dragons Blade on and off but its just making me more stressed and down in the dumps, so I've put that away and decided to blog >__>. Well, let's start by a simple rant on my MCAT classes. First of all, I have English. And let me tell you, when I sit in that English class, I feel like I am an illiterate savage who butchers the English language every time I open my mouth. I mean, even though the teacher talks in Urdu like 90% of the time, he writes sentences on the board and I'm like, "nothing wrong there, man, 'sall good" and then he proceeds to take out lots of errors and gives them all sorts of fancy names I've never heard like... like I can't even remember right now. But I'll give you an example.

W: What is the time on your watch?
C: What is the time by your watch?
W: He is more stronger than any man living.
C: He is more stronger than any other man living.
W: The sun rises from the east.
C: The sun rises in the east.

I honestly can't ever completely agree with him. And that's starting to scare me a bit because I need a good grade on this test >.> and if my barbaric English is the cause of my failure than I am super lame. I'm going to have to find a solution to this problem. It's no good if I keep thinking that my English is good just because I can speak it fluently (like, omg what if I actually AM butchering the English language every time I open my mouth?! o.o).

Next is Chemisty which isn't so bad. After that is Physics which isn't so bad while it's happening (because everything apparently makes sense while the teacher is talking) but as son as you decide to turn your brain on and try it out for yourself thinking "omg lol physiks sho easy lef me twai" and then then... *deflated balloon sound*. After that is a test period.

Basically, you get these booklets and you're supposed to bubble in your answers (bubbling fun o3o) and then you get a test sheet which you do not get to keep >.> anyway, tests aren't that bad. I like bubbling. There's negative marking though, like if you get an answer right, it's 5 points and if you leave an answer its 0 points and if you get an answer wrong, its -1 points. I did my first test ever completely (no blanks) and I ended up with like 44/60 (which doesn't look so bad, but if you figure out your actual score with the scheme I outlined above, it's not good o.o) so then I decided to skip the questions I didn't know instead of randomly guessing it out. No significant improvement has been seen yet e.e

Sometimes, I have these random moments of teenage angstyness (is that a word? or am I at my butchering again >.> this spell check suggests the latter) where I'm like "omg I'm totally alone.. so alone.." and then I'm like "Nah, whateves man, its cool"
<<OMG LOOK AT THE CUTE KITTY ISN'T HE ADORABLE OMG I WANT TO SQUISH IT BUT I KNOW I PROBABLY WONT HAVE THE GUTS TO EVER DO THAT TO AN ACTUAL KITTY

Well, I think that's enough rant for today. I'm going to try sleeping early for once >.> enough studying and obsessing over things I don't know till 12am.