I think every one has had those times where they used to have a pretty good friend who has just either drifted away or vanished completely. Don't you hate it when that happens?
Well, it's most certainly not your fault, I'd say. I think I've written this somewhere before, but I'll write it again. Personality is a dynamic aspect of a person and it is constantly under evolution. Your personality will never be static because it's going to be affected and continuously modified with every new bit and byte of information that enters your system.
Having said that, with so many different people constantly evolving in so many ways, its almost reasonable to realize that of course, some cogs will not turn together in the same direction. There will always be people who would have evolved -although they may appear to be static- but the result of some may not be pretty for all.
It's okay if someone leaves for you that. I think I understand things like this completely. People are not dolls, they think and feel for themselves and everyone has a right to go where they think they fit in better or where they are given the attention they think is deserved.
You might think that means you're left behind, but that's not exactly correct. You see, it takes two people to tango, or in urdu, taali do haath se bajti hai (you can only clap with two hands). And from Newton's point of view, every action has an equal and opposite reaction. You might think you're stationary, but that is not true at all. You change just as much as the other people around you. You just have to sit down and see yourself through the days and weeks and months and years.
But the thing is, there are times when you have to rethink about those old days and you wonder if you could set things right, perhaps. Let me tell you right now.
#NotPossible #Nope #Don'tEvenTry
I've tried patching things up TWICE and both failed, epicly. The first attempt was when I just randomly texted for absolutely no reason other than to strike up a conversation. Of course, the conversation happened but it kept losing its "We're talking!" spark so fast, I was like "Naw, okay let's give up" and didn't bother replying when it was my turn to reply to a ".__." text.
Next, there was a third party who told me that the other person was like "Omg Catalina doesn't talk with us". Wait, let me explain this one properly. What happened was a sort of a fight where I was neutral-ish and then things got bad and people split up. So the split group was on their own and pretty happy about it too, so I couldn't really bring myself to say "Yo wassup" or anything cause that would be kind of awkward. I mean, I didn't wanna seem too clingy or end up trying to pile up guilt on their side.
Anyway, so on the request of this third person, I texted the person a neutral "Hello" and I get messages that come back like, twenty minutes later every time. But it wasn't even a proper conversation, it just went like "Hello" "?" "I said hello" "Hmm?" "I just wanted to say hello" (this was the conversation that lasted about an hour) and then "What do you want" "I was just checking up on you, like whats up and stuff" "Are you kidding me?" "Ah.. which answer would be be best?" and then there was a long pause and then "I'm sorry but I'm a polite person, go talk with someone else"
Having said that, with so many different people constantly evolving in so many ways, its almost reasonable to realize that of course, some cogs will not turn together in the same direction. There will always be people who would have evolved -although they may appear to be static- but the result of some may not be pretty for all.
It's okay if someone leaves for you that. I think I understand things like this completely. People are not dolls, they think and feel for themselves and everyone has a right to go where they think they fit in better or where they are given the attention they think is deserved.
You might think that means you're left behind, but that's not exactly correct. You see, it takes two people to tango, or in urdu, taali do haath se bajti hai (you can only clap with two hands). And from Newton's point of view, every action has an equal and opposite reaction. You might think you're stationary, but that is not true at all. You change just as much as the other people around you. You just have to sit down and see yourself through the days and weeks and months and years.
But the thing is, there are times when you have to rethink about those old days and you wonder if you could set things right, perhaps. Let me tell you right now.
#NotPossible #Nope #Don'tEvenTry
I've tried patching things up TWICE and both failed, epicly. The first attempt was when I just randomly texted for absolutely no reason other than to strike up a conversation. Of course, the conversation happened but it kept losing its "We're talking!" spark so fast, I was like "Naw, okay let's give up" and didn't bother replying when it was my turn to reply to a ".__." text.
Next, there was a third party who told me that the other person was like "Omg Catalina doesn't talk with us". Wait, let me explain this one properly. What happened was a sort of a fight where I was neutral-ish and then things got bad and people split up. So the split group was on their own and pretty happy about it too, so I couldn't really bring myself to say "Yo wassup" or anything cause that would be kind of awkward. I mean, I didn't wanna seem too clingy or end up trying to pile up guilt on their side.
Anyway, so on the request of this third person, I texted the person a neutral "Hello" and I get messages that come back like, twenty minutes later every time. But it wasn't even a proper conversation, it just went like "Hello" "?" "I said hello" "Hmm?" "I just wanted to say hello" (this was the conversation that lasted about an hour) and then "What do you want" "I was just checking up on you, like whats up and stuff" "Are you kidding me?" "Ah.. which answer would be be best?" and then there was a long pause and then "I'm sorry but I'm a polite person, go talk with someone else"
LIKE EXCUSE ME ARE YOU IMPLYING THAT I AM NOT POLITE DID YOU JUST NOTICE HOW LONG IT TOOK YOU TO REPLY ARE YOU SAYING THAT I AM RUDE DID YOU JUST CALL ME RUDE HOW DARE YOU- GO DROWN IN SEAWEED EXCUSE ME.
So, lesson learned is DON'T EVEN BOTHER TRYING TO WIN BACK FRIENDS WHO DON'T EVEN CARE because no one is going to notice the effort you put in, no one is going to notice how you gathered up the courage, no one is going acknowledge that you tried. And you know the worst part? The person you're trying to make it up to will most definitely make themselves feel victimized and tell themselves "I don't deserve to have this person come talk to me" and that would just make the overall balance even worse. So don't do it. Don't try gluing things back. It'll just get even more ugly. Leave it where it is. No one will think twice when they walk by the shattered remains. No one... except you.
Love the "Drown in seaweed" part! And the logical references :O wow. And yeah, thats true :l some people aren't worth the heartache.
ReplyDeleteI agree. All my friends have someone else they'd prefer so I dont have anyone that is very close with me.
ReplyDeleteBack in grade 9, I used to be there for my friends during their difficult times. After they had vented out their frustrations and sought advice; I would just move on. You know like not asking personal questions when they were happy because I expected them to come forward by themselves just like they came when they were depressed. But it never happened. I wasn't too demanding and was very accepting. It backfired but in the end I let all of it go. Khair. Nobody will be with you forever. You came alone in this world you'll leave alone too. I guess the key to success is to not stick firmly to anyone.
ReplyDeleteBut you are an exception. Kiss. Kiss.