the emo wolverine writes

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Saturday, July 19, 2014

The Ramadan Diaries; Second Ashrah

So 2/3rds of Ramadan is already over, although it still feels like it just started. I don't feel as apprehensive about fasting as I used to feel in the beginning and that's because I've got used to it. I was listening to a lecture by Nouman Ali Khan earlier and the gist was something like 'Your stomach tells your heart "I'm hungry! Let's eat something!" and your heart says "Shut up! No food until Maghrib!"'

So Ramadan is basically you being able to tell your body to shut up and endure it which is pretty amazing because normally, you don't endure it. Whenever you're hungry, you automatically go to the fridge and check what's available but in Ramadan, you just steer clear of the kitchen- you don't even bother to check what you could have eaten if you weren't fasting.

If it's so easy to control your food and drink intake, it shouldn't be too hard controlling other things your life totally doesn't depend on.

Anyway, this week was pretty busy in the sense that we had invited people over for iftar two times and both times involved a lot of people. That obviously increases the work load and preparation three times and I can't help but get rather cranky. That's what happened the first time. Its like, I get told we're having about 8 people over and then when I'm almost done preparing the fruit dish I make, it turns out that there are 5 more people coming and that I'd better accommodate for them as well. Believe me, I love having loads of people come over but I don't like having what I've planned turned upside down.

When I cut the fruit, it's all really ordered and mathematical, such that every dish gets the same amount of apples and bananas and peaches and it really makes me mad when the balance is upset (is it OCD? Maybe o.o)

There was supposed to be a seminar on 14th July which I really wanted to go to. It was about the MCAT (medical college admission test) and it was being held in Rawalpindi Medical College. The main reason I wanted to go was because the only medical college I have seen so far is Shifa. Anyway, Monday morning- I'm going to academy and I'm half asleep and I meet my friend in the hallway and she's like "Aren't you going?" and I didn't understand what she meant because I'd totally forgotten about the seminar.

When I remembered, I kind of panicked and started texting my parents.

Baba: Ok. Don't panic. It's okay. We'll get the form when available.

Me: I was supposed to go to RMC (Rawalpindi Medical College) today at 10 o'clock!
Amee: ok.

^My reaction.

So I didn't go which wasn't really a problem but its just that I wanted to see what that medical college looks like but I'm sure I'll get loads of chances later when I try to get admission in there.

My MCAT classes have been going alright. Did I tell you about the new English teacher we have? This new one is younger than the old one and he's super energetic and he likes demonstrating what he's talking about to the point that it gets extremely awkward. Like, I can't tell if I should laugh at him or just be embarrassed on his behalf. For example.

Him: Question twenty seven.
Him: After our dash criticisms, we were asked to leave the stadium.
Him: The correct answer is-
Everyone: Alpha!
Him: I wouldn't say alpha is wrong, I mean "After our vocal criticisms, we were asked to leave the stadium" is correct.
Him: But beta, "Hurled" is a better word because hurled is like throwing insults.
Him: Hurl is like
Everyone: *pin drop silence* o.o
Him: See, that is hurled.

One thing I don't understand about the academy is why it has to be so difficult sometimes. We had a "self study" counseling session one morning where the counselor guy came in and he was like "So kids, you have to study!" and then he outlined this plan which, in my opinion, made us look like nothing less than beasts made for studying. First he's like "Study everything you learned today at home" and then he's like "Ask the teachers what they're teaching tomorrow and then study that as well" and then "Don't forget to study for the daily test you get assigned" and "You should study 8 hours" and "Try maxing it to 10" and "Finish one course book in one day"

^My reaction

Like, excuse me, I do not exist for studying, are you trying to pretend my summer vacations don't exist, do I look like a nerd to you. Anyway, I DO study what I think I should study but to be honest, it's maximum two hours because I only study for the daily test and when I'm done, I think I'm ready for the test but it's an extreme understatement when I get the test sheet the next day.

It's horrible. I don't think I'll be able to pass this test. I'm just hoping my A grades from O Levels and A Levels carry my overall percentage up to the bare minimum (If I even get As in my A2 result, InshaAllah) because I'm starting to lose hope on the MCAT. The studying is way too fast, there's too many things I haven't even studied ever and my mind is on the O/A Level study track where I give importance to concept and knowing the numerical alone. But in the MCAT, you need to memorize -what I call useless- facts and figures. I hate memorizing facts and figures. Why should I care about which scientist discovered what or what the three frontiers of science are.

I disagree with the frontiers of science questions from the depth of my heart. There's this ONE sentence in the physics book which says "There are three frontiers of science which are.." and proceeds to name three frontiers as first, second and third and if you ask me, the order doesn't matter but if you ask the MCAT, order TOTALLY matters.

^I think I'm going to have to rewire my brain and have it  obsess over totally useless bits of information that makes me, currently, twist my mouth in disgust at its utter uselessness. I'm sorry, but I think this is turning into a rant again D:

We went out shopping one day for shoes. It didn't go very well. There was this one pair of shoes I really liked and wanted but my foot was too slim and kept sticking out way too much from the front. I tried getting a size smaller but it wasn't available. All the other stores had shoes that were too open. I like covered, closed shoes better since my feet aren't exactly what I'd class as pretty enough to parade. So I just walked around pretending to look interested in shoes I did not like.

^My reaction.

I've finished the third season of Sherlock and a book I was reading, called "A Tale for the Time Being" which I'll review soon. That's all as of yet. :D

Ramadan Mubarak.


  1. I always feel awkward when I accidentally enter a shop and realise as soon as I enter that I don't like any of the things. I always look around anyway just to not offend the shop owner. ^^ My feet are horrible, too, hahah! Glad to hear you've gotten used to Ramadan!

    By the by, I've tagged you for a TMI 'award'! Check out my blog for further details! ^^

    1. It's even more awkward when your parents are like "We brought you here for a reason >.> hurry and buy something!"
      Thanks for the award, cupcake :)

  2. I agree with what you say about fasting! It does take a lot of self control and endurance to do it..especially if one likes snacking a lot (.__.)

    1. It's seriously amazing xD but I can't wait for the fasting to end and start eating either :)


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